by AmoLaZucca on YouTube
The title of this post might have been
"What A Drag Clean Up Is After Christmas",
until I fell upon the first photo in this post.
It had a link to the song which I have put right under her picture.
The music is beautiful....
and the message slapped me in the face.
I needed it.
I can get to feeling sorry for myself.
I can bitch and moan.
And then something or someone reminds me....
how fortunate some of us are to have a turkey to cook for our families.
I have had some pretty crummy Holiday Seasons....
but it is my nature to.
The holidays get me to feeling 'raw'.
Yesterday I was driving with my top down,
it was a gorgeous day in sunny Boca Raton
and I just started crying.
I am no Hallmark Card kid from a Hallmark Card family.
(Who is?)
It was something
related to my expectations.
It was a little thing that always happens
between my daughter and myself.
It is always the same old thing....
So why do I continually
expect a different outcome
the next time the same issue comes up?
There is a saying;
The definition of insanity is
"Doing the same thing over and over, and expecting different results"
But I do.
I think I keep hoping things will be different.
I need to keep the focus on myself.
On my issues, on who I am, and what my actions are.
I need to lower my expectations.
And just love her....and let her go.
I don't mean let her go like
I don't care what she does or who she is,
but accept her for who she is.
(And lower my expectations)
Usually when I am having any kind of problem
it stems from how, and from where I am viewing the issue.
There are more people in this country
that are homeless and losing their homes than will be 'made public.'
They are not dealing with cleaning up after xmas.
They are not putting away all the precious xmas ornaments.
They are not dealing with all the garbage
from the xmas packages being gleefully torn open
last night or this morning.
They had no xmas dinner to clean up,
no xmas morning breakfast dishes to load in the dishwasher.
They gave their children nothing.
Maybe they found something in the garbage
that they cleaned up and wrapped in a shopping bag for their child.
Or if they were lucky....
they got something from " Toys For Tots'.
Think about that.
I need to.
I was able to do what I needed to this year.
I need to have gratitude.
It is so easy to forget what we do have in our lives.
Even if we do have
THE LUXURY of cleaning up after xmas.
Bye Bye Christmas.
Until Next Year.....
Love you guys....and you know who you are XXX's
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